Excerpt from Mark Masterson's "TRAVEL TO MARS IN 45 MINUTES OR LESS "

...Your friends will always tell you that you should not mix your drinks. That beer before liquor makes you sicker. That you should keep the dark ones safe from the clear ones. They tell you this, but they always tell you this the next fucking day, when your head is full of acidblood and your skin is made of match heads. Why do they never mention this on the night? Why can’t they warn you before you drink, or even step in with a quick “Why don’t you stick to vodka tonight?” when you head for the bar? And here’s you thinking, “Oh, I must be okay. Why else would they keep buying me drinks?” Well…

I’ll tell you why: these fuckers aren’t your friends. They’re Pod People. They do the Devil’s work. They look like your friends, you started the night with your friends, but give them a few drinks, cross the line into Mars Territory, and they are Replaced. They are the fey ones, the goblins that steal children. A good night of fun will replace your comrades with Stepford Drinkers, Charlie. They want you to become one of them. Hence: they tell you nothing.

THE MOMENT OF TRUTH comes when Jacker Blacker offers me a beer. The sun hasn’t even gone down. And the truth is that I haven’t had a drink before sundown in four years. But I know that Diego O’Toole would have the beer. I know that Vincent Blackshadow has to cover the story by living the story. I know that I am getting out the old maps to Mars, checking my spacesuit of paisley, and now they are asking me if I want to start climbing up the ladder to the capsule. It reminds me, you know, of that scene in the first Matrix flick. Morpheus has Neo in that abandoned hotel, in front of the mirror, and he offers him a choice:

“After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill… the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe… whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill…you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.”

This is the moment of choice. This is when you decide to have that drink. That sixth drink rather than just the five. Or one drink when you wouldn’t have had any. When you nod to the man asking if you need a hit. When you buy the acid from the ten-year old in the club. When you stay up reading the whole book rather than just one verse. When you agree to do the freeway mural in spraycans. This is when you decide to pump another ten pounds of iron. This is when you ask her out. This is when you dump him. This is when you take your first step into a larger world, as Obi-Wan Kenobi would say. Take the blue pill, you’ve had fun, like everyone else, but you haven’t done anything fantastic. You haven’t pushed it. You haven’t made anyone’s night. You haven’t awoken any sleeping part of yourself, you haven’t adventured. Vincent Blackshadow says: Always take the red pill. Sign me up, Morpheus. Bring on the dancing robots. Wake me up before I die in my sleep.

The rabbit hole goes all the way to Mars...